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Friday, December 31, 2010

Out with the old...

"Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson 

2010 is almost over. It seems as though the older I get the faster the years pass. I keep thinking 2010 was a buss year. What does that mean? I feel as though I've been grumpy and whiny for most of it. Even now as the year comes to a close - I feel unwell. Swollen tonsils, body aches, fever/chills... this is not what I need right now. Nor do I feel the need for the stress of having to finish this dissertation in time for January 4th. Am still stuck on 'why am I doing this MBA again?' - I feel like giving it all up - going off somewhere and doing non-academic type work. What's preventing me from doing this? Money - or the lack thereof... am too practical-minded or maybe I don't have enough faith - I need to know that there is a steady income coming from somewhere - this might be because I'm a Taurus... or it might be the influence of my dad who is Very Practical and Real World. One cannot live on dreams alone (though I'd wither away without them). 

2011 is almost here. I want it to be filled with joy. I want a good year. I want to travel and experience new experiences. I don't want to have to worry about money or health (of myself and my family) or what I should be doing. I want freedom and a job which allows for some creative expression. Lately I've been thinking I want a partner - I haven't been too impressed with what's on offer around me though. I want to be finished with this MBA. Argh! *sigh* 

My mom tagged me in a post from Paulo Coelho Did you walk a path that wasn't yours? I don't know? Maybe. I hope that whatever I've done has some purpose to it... some contribution to the future me. How does one know one's path? I'd like to have a clue in 2011. 

Wishing you a peaceful ending to 2010 and all that you dream of for 2011. 

love,
Ren

2 comments:

Vijay said...

My Favourite post so far Ren. I know exactly how you feel, having those very same experiences. All I can say is that, time makes it all possible... Happy New Year!

King Vijay

Ren said...

Happy New Year to u too :) I think we all have similar-ish experiences - it's only in sharing them that we realise though.. :S

<3 to u & wife