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Thursday, February 24, 2011

I want a new job.

"It was the secrets of heaven and earth that I desired to learn; and whether it was the outward substance of things, or the inner spirit of nature and the mysterious soul of man that occupied me, still my inquiries were directed to the metaphysical, or, in its highest sense, the physical secrets of the world." ~ Mary Shelley

I really do want a new job. I've been saying this for some time (as in since 2009). It's not that I've got a bad job per se... it's just that I'm simply not happy with it... and perhaps now is the time to get serious about moving on. Today is Thursday - every single day since last Thursday I've arrived at work in a fairly pleasant mood and within less than an hour have had that good mood plummet... sink so much so that I'm fairly grouchy and have to constantly remind myself to be nice to people. As Kathy Bremer says in this article: 'When I wake up two days in a row lacking excitement about work, it's time to consider a move'. I've been waking up and seriously contemplating calling in sick every day for this week so far (in fact the only reason I didn't is because I took last Friday off :s)... It's obviously time to move on.

People (family and friends) may wonder why. I'm permanent after all. I get a fairly ok salary & health insurance and the company contributes each month towards my pension fund. I get upkeep allowance for my car (because my position requires going off site to visit other companies). It's not far from home - about 30 minutes away on a good day (15 minutes on a *really* good day a.k.a. a day with no traffic). I can do the work. I sometimes like the work - it's interesting at times. These are all the reasons I've not left yet.

I want to leave though. I read this article recently... trying to figure out if I could make myself happier with the job... but no. I still want to leave (and soon). It's just stressful... The work is frustrating when processes aren't followed. The persons in management positions don't seem to know how to manage. My eyes seem to be failing after so much time spent doing computer work (seriously - today I could not tell a cat from a dog :s). Am generally concerned about my overall health. "Is it all worth it" - is the question that I'm asking myself and more often I'm coming up with no.

So. I want a new job. I just have to figure out what that new job could be. What are my skills? What are my strengths? What do I like doing? Why am I drawing a blank here??? *Sigh* I've done the Myers-Briggs test... and found out that I'm an INFsomething... I say something because at different times I've been INFP and others INFJ... I need a career that is more than a job - I knew this before the test but this confirms it right? I just need to figure out exactly what it is that I want... help?

Yesterday I went to the mall (to pay bills... ergh... went book-browsing - which turned into book-buying - to cheer myself up after) and was accosted by a lady wanting to know if I'd like to know another way of earning income. Hmm. Is it a scam? A sign from the Universe? Apparently they (group of ladies) were taking names for a seminar this weekend on how one can start another revenue stream... Hmm. Today, I opened up my inbox and found an email from Omega - encouraging me to Join their Seasonal Staff... I would absolutely love to do that... except I'd have to pay air fare and etc... hmm.

Perhaps I should make a list of some sort... will go back and read articles and spend time on reflection and the like... My hexagram today (courtesy Tarot.com) is Revolutionary Change - it refers to that time of life when things need stirring up. I feel stirred - just not sure when I'll be settled. 

Help?
ren 


p.s. another quote just because I like this one as well:
"Your work is to discover your work and then, with all your heart, to give yourself to it." ~Buddha

3 comments:

guaicotamana said...

I so dig you.
You make me laugh, and right now,.. I need to.

My father is lamenting.. tamoxifen.. is there nothing else. His wife died of breast cancer.

Now her niece has it at 38.

I had a job in December. I quit. I haven't been working of recent. It seems very unimportant.

I guess cancer does that.

I am seriously considering doing the post graduate diploma in epidemiology, if only to have some certainty in my life.. when amist this crisis... there seems to be none.

Oh getting side tracked sorry

guaicotamana said...

On to job,.. Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Judging
uhmm...

I'm .. well .. It was in an ISTP profession.. and such is my training.

Strangely, on your list is massage therapist which I am currently doing.

I just quit, but my financial circumstances allow it. Try a course, locally to see if you like something else.

If you have your degree already, they let you sign up as a specially admitted student at UWI, or non-matriculated at COSTAATT.

I also did some shadowing. Was planning on going away to study,.. but now.. I am obsessed by the question..

Do I have a ticking time bomb in my chest?.. Shall I just figure out the answer myself for a master's thesis.

Gone to photocopy, Rothman, Epidemiology .. an introduction.

I must be mad.

Ren said...

laughter is the best medicine :)

tamoxifen - we've had our own issues with that as well :s

strangely - I thought of becoming a massage therapist when I was 17 - didn't cuz I have a complicated relationship with my dad :s anyway... am trying to figure it out. by april I'll have an MBA - am considering non-profit/volunteer work.. will see..

I think you can't let illness limit you - so long as you feel you can do stuff then do it..