Monday, December 5, 2011

Can you change who you are?

"You can’t be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet." ~Hal Borland 

It's December. Where did the year go? I'm busy with multiple projects in work (just call me Super Woman) and with Christmas (shopping, friends, family!). I love this time of year though - December is my second favourite month of the year. It just seems that everyone is more happy. Or it could be that I'm more happy around December what with all the music and the food and the shopping and the liming. December is awesome. 

What's not-so-awesome? Family squabbles. I guess they happen in every family/household when things need doing and aren't getting done (or aren't being done properly). People respond differently to emotional drama. Emotions can hijack us and leave us a weepy mess... or they can cause us to withdraw into our very best impression of a stone statue. Emotions are tricky things and we all deal with them differently. This is something I must remember. It's not just my way or the highway. 

Can you change who you are?

There are things about ourselves that we can change. On Friday I went rock wall climbing. It was scary (I'm afraid of heights - there's a reason I'm short and that is because I'm supposed to be close to the ground)... and yet it was also exhilarating. Scary because well... whoa - I was up very high. Exhilarating because my fear is not the boss of me, I am the boss of my fear. This is something I've been telling myself often - it seems to be working because a few years back there was no way anyone was going to get me up that wall. 

There are things about ourselves that we cannot change. We cannot change how something may affect us - there will always be situations that will tug at our heartstrings or punch us in the gut or overwhelm us with some emotion or other. What we can change is how we react, how we respond and I think part of that is realising how others may react/respond.

My parents (in my mind at least) have always been opposites - heart-oriented vs head-oriented... the emotional vs the logical. As I've gotten older I've seen them become more balanced but still stay true to their .. orientation. It's something I can't change in them and something I'm working on in myself. Finding the balance. I don't want to be more of one than the other but there lies the question... can I change who I am? If one is inherently more of one than the other ... will it always be so?

I'm thoughtful tonight... If you have thoughts or ideas feel free to share...



Anonymous said...

How expensive was the rock climbing? was it indoors or outdoors? I used to do this in my university days. But I don't think I am fit enough to do it anymore

Unknown said...

The appearance of the emotional-rational duality is just that, an appearance. To imagine that such faculties exist within the human distinctly is a mistake. No matter how logical you believe yourself to be, most of it will be determined by your feelings of what the outcome should be. No matter how emotional you are, there is a rationalization involved in being in that emotional state. As with all duality it is part of the grand play, in a manner of speaking. In terms of the usefulness of this sort of knowledge. Certain emotions lend well to generating sound logical conclusions - a peaceful, calm state will usually allow the greatest flexibility of thoughts, and thus stronger rationalization. But likewise, powerful logical processes can cause you to create emotions in order to deal with situation. All in all the most important thing is that you operate from a place of control of both faculties, with the understanding that they interact freely, and with a detachment to the results that might occur.

Anonymous said...

I can't find a link or number for the rockclimbing, at that price I think I will check it out. Please oblige.

Happy New Year