Thursday, April 25, 2013

A note on accepting condolences:

Do it with grace. 

I've found that it's one of the hardest things. It's just over three weeks since my mom's passing... there have been a lot of condolences, sympathy notes and calls. Lots of family and friends who feel sorrow about her death and are concerned about us. I'm still receiving condolences as people find out. 

Such events spread ripples in our lives. 

Yesterday my manager and I were alone in our lunchroom - she asked if she could give me a hug ... if I was up for receiving hugs. I don't know that I ever will be up for receiving sympathy hugs but I took it anyway. Hugs help even if you're not sure you want them. Each bit of sympathy is a reminder that my mom is no longer physically with us. While it lets me know that people are there to share in our sorrow... to lessen the ache... it hurts a bit because it is also a reminder of why I need it. 

People want to share their own stories and experiences they've had with mom. This is both a blessing and... not. I am grateful because in their sharing I learn more about someone that has been such a big part of my life. I am saddened that I won't get to create more stories and experiences with her. 

It's hard when people ask how I'm doing and if all is well. Hard to smile and accept condolences. I do my best just because I know people are concerned and also, in the case of close friends and family, experiencing their own loss. 

I'm fine... sad and missing my mom's physical presence, especially as the birthday draws near, but otherwise I'm fine. 

Thanks for all the love and support. 

peace,
Ren


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Peace to you, Doll.