...and I'm back.

"The sense of community is indispensable… to full self-realization." ~Herbert J. Muller 

Again. I'm here to stay for a bit. 

New moon in Sagittarius with a Solar Eclipse. Time for focusing on what I want to bring into being. This of course makes me wonder exactly what I want to bring into being. I'm a bit fuzzy on that. I've been a bit raw. Emotionally frazzled. Physically tired. Mentally stressed. I want a healthier me... calm, cool, collected. Bending without breaking. I want ... peace and happiness. It's the season for it isn't it? 

I've been up to a lot lately... it's part of why I've been missing. The crazy? Work, work, work and some crazy people... some of whom I work with and some of whom need to find themselves a life... or just grow up really. 

The fun? UpMarket. I was invited by Cupcake Wench (everyone's favourite purveyor of mouthwatering cupcakes) and her hubby (I stole her description from his site) and was most happy that I attended. Am thinking perhaps I should say that my belly was very happy that I attended since that's a bit more accurate. If you're ever in Trinidad and Tobago and decide to visit UpMarket (apparently it's going to be held regularly) here's some advice: don't go when you're hungry. Seriously. I found myself paying way more attention to the yummy foodstuff than the pretty clothing/jewellery/miscellaneous stuff. In fact, I came home with cupcakes (of course), tomato chutney, Chuck Norris pepper sauce (bought from Zaaki), olive bites, cheesecake-stuffed-strawberries and a jar of hummus. *sigh* The only non-edible items were 4 scented candles (I think vanilla and lavender)... a steelpan music CD  (Caribbean Christmas by Robert Tobitt)... and a coaster for my dad made of pink poui wood. I was very impressed by the variety of stalls and the quality of merchandise/foodstuff. I'll probably be attending again at some point. 

Something else I went to because a friend asked - Hott 93's Polar Plunge (I think it was an anniversary party). It's not something I'd usually go to. I'm not a big fan of crowds. Wasn't really in the mood. It was all about support... because it was the first time my girl Shazelle was performing in Trinidad and Tobago. The event was... *meh* but her performance was awesome. Yes, I did take photos (which are still on my camera along with photos from Divali and other various activities :s). Am hopeful that there are many more songs/videos/performances to come. 

The interesting? I attended the "National Consultation on Securing and Expanding the GATE Programme". It was for work and so can possibly be included under 'the crazy' as the lead up to it was stressful and just plain crazy with people changing their minds at the last minute and such. It's a good thing I have patience. The GATE Programme has three main objectives:

• To make tertiary education affordable to all so that no citizen of Trinidad and Tobago would be denied tertiary education because of inability to pay;
• To widen access to tertiary education that would support economic development and promote social equity; and
• To build and strengthen a national quality tertiary education sector through both public and private tertiary level institutions

I found the actual Consultation to be interesting - it was the first such to be held with regards to the GATE programme which I find to be very sad, considering that the programme has been in operation since 2004, and also very heartening in that the various stakeholders involved are being asked to provide their thoughts, grievances and recommendations. Lots of relevant points made, some new things proposed... am waiting to see what will come of it. It's a step in the right direction but if it doesn't go all the way then there's not much of a point to it.  

See how much I've been up to? So much happening and so much still to happen.  It's the fun and the interesting and the crazy that makes up my days and I'm just grateful that the fun and interesting outweigh the crazy.  What's going on in your corner of the world? I'm curious ...and I hope that the good outweighs the bad. 

peace,

Ren

A thankful Thursday...

"The hardest arithmetic to master is that which enables us to count our blessings." ~Eric Hoffer 

I've been very grumpy today... which is not abnormal - while to most people I may seem to be very even-tempered and happy and such, I do consider myself to be... moody. I try not to be on Thursdays though... I have a special fondness for Thursdays as you'd know if you read the 'about me' page. The overall combination of traffic, crazy drivers, workplace drama - people not understanding the processes and family squabbles have however managed to make me very grumpy today. I don't much like it and so in an effort to budge up and get back into a somewhat positive frame of mind I thought I'd do this post... stuff that I'm thankful for today. Without further ado then, I am thankful...:

1. that I have a home and family - they drive me crazy (both individually and combined) but they love me and ultimately want what's best for me and for me to be the best I can be. In times of crisis (real or imagined) I know they'll have my back.
2. that I have my driver's license and a car to drive - I can totally get where I wanna go whenever I want to get there (sorta - it may sometimes take much longer than I anticipate due to crazy drivers and traffic). 
3. that I've got a job - it pays my bills and allows me to go on two week trips to the USA without too much worry about finances. It also allows me to partake of random indulgences like book-shopping, impromptu movie-watching dates and Hagen Dazs/Cold Stone visits.
4. that I get along fairly well with people - I imagine my workplace would be much worse (for both myself and others) if I didn't...
5. for long pants - I like skirts I do... sometimes though one needs long pants - especially when one's leg hair is growing back and it itches so much that you're tempted to scratch off all your skin - if you've never had such experiences then count yourself lucky ... as a side-note I almost did a mini-rant-type-post this morning about hair-removal and hair-growth and why lord, why??! Got distracted by work though...
6. for music - I left work in a bad mood... luckily my car has a radio... and Lou Bega's Mambo No. 5 is such a happy song that it's hard to not sing-along ... and of course singing along cheers people up (or at least cheers me up). Additionally, this particular song has a memory attached that makes me smile - I'll always remember that it came out in 1999 cuz that was the first time I visited New York - we stayed by my aunt and in one particular store on Liberty, while I was at the cashier, this song came on - the girl that was cashing was very into it - singing and moving to the beat - when she saw me grinning she confided that her name was Rita... so, of course, she loved the song. Lol... 
7. for pets - cuz they love you unconditionally. We've got a dog and a cat - such distinct personalities and most entertaining characters.

I'm sure I can think of more if I tried harder... I've got a lot to be thankful for and really must remember this when I'm feeling grumpy. What are you thankful for? Friends, family, acquaintances, circumstances... when we put our minds to it there's a lot to be found and I think it's in remembering and celebrating this that we get joy.

Wishing you much happiness,

Ren

Cyndi Lauper - True Colors

Natasha Bedingfield - Unwritten (US Version)

Finding rhythm...

"To live is to be musical, starting with the blood dancing in your veins. Everything living has a rhythm. Do you feel your music?" ~Michael Jackson

Today is the anniversary of the death of Michael Jackson... his death day... I don't think he needs any type of introduction really... He was one of the greatest entertainers of his time - the King of Pop - and contributed to music, dance and fashion. Taking a moment here to remember him.

 

I've been learning to play tassa - in the bit of spare time I've got... lol. It's fun and it's with my my girlfriends and it's for the wedding of one of our group. We'll only be playing perhaps a 2-minute rhythm (details aren't finalised yet) and then the actual tassa group will be playing. It's meant as a sorta-gift... we're her bridesmaids you see. It's pretty cool. 

The problem is... I can't seem to find my rhythm. It's a bit of an issue as I'm the 'fulley' - am supposed to hold a steady rhythm for the group. Ergh. lol.. Ah well... I've been feeling tense lately... bit stifled... bit claustrophobic...  which could be the reason of course... Just have to figure out how to get through it.  

Saw the movie Fame (the 2009 version) on Sunday with my family... Kinda wish there was a performing arts school to go to - even though I know that in my own teenage years I was even more shy and non-participative than I am now. I feel like dancing and singing and such though - there should be somewhere Trini people can go to with a large space and wooden floors and fabulous acoustics... I miss the yoga room at Hill House at Kripalu though while I was there I didn't make that much use of it.

Gotta figure it out - get into a groove... maybe channel MJ at our tassa practice today. Isn't it funny that my I Ching hexagram for today is "containment of potential"? Focused attention is required it says... Hmm...

peace,
Rtr

Shakira Ft. Freshlyground - Waka Waka (Official Music Vid)

Moved by the music...

"We pass through hundreds, thousands, perhaps millions of existences. In each lifetime, we're exploring another part of our own self, which is eternity." ~ Frederick Philip Lenz, III

This is an in-between post... a post that I'm just posting as I feel the need to instead of it being planned that oh! I have to blog! ... Does this mean I'm getting into the hang of blogging? Perhaps...

I'm in serious love with One Republic's song "All the Right Moves"... It makes me feel like dancing... and singing... which is perhaps what great songs do. Am aware that people's love of music is subjective... I myself have such a wide span of music love that it's hard to pinpoint what I do and don't love.

Am also in serious love with the video for that song... it is gorgeous. Masquerade balls? Ballroom dancing? yup... I love it. Stuff going on behind the scenes yet in plain view? Love love love... lol 

Was watching the video today though ...whilst in work... I really should be working... ergh... anyway. Was watching the vid today... and remembering how much I love stuff that has those elements... ballroom dancing... fabulously dressed ballroom ppl... Phantom of the Opera's Masquerade scene is one of my *favourites*... and am thinking to myself... why do I like it?

Does it speak to a part of myself that I don't know about? Was I around in a past life in that time period? I believe in past lives... fully and completely... if it offends you dear reader then don't read this post. I love the dresses and the general air of how that time is portrayed but am quite sure I would not have liked having to dress up and such that way all the time. Is it that my major liking for comfort clothes now is a throwback to such a time? Who needs corsets anyway? Except in certain circumstances of course. Am also sure that what is portrayed through film and theatre now - the elements which I really like - would have been a small part of life in that era. It shall remain a mystery I guess...

I've done past life readings both with people and by myself (through the use of Tarot) and what I do know is that when people say I've got an old soul the best thing to do is smile mysteriously cuz it's a truer statement than they think.

peace,

Rtr