I like going to different places.

"Take me to the places on the earth that teach you how to dance, the places where you can risk letting the world break your heart, and I will take you to the places where the earth beneath my feet and the stars overhead make my heart whole again and again." ~Oriah Mountain Dreamer

Today I saw an article on CNN.com: 11 places to go in 2014. Number 7 on that list is Costa Rica; specifically Playas de Nosara on the Nicoya Peninsula because of the area's 'officially approved beaches'. I just got back home from there and can tell you that yes, the area is beautiful - just be sure to carry your bug repellent (and umbrella if you're visiting during the rainy season). 

I love travelling whether it is going to new places or revisiting places I've been. I love city spaces and country spaces. I love beaches and mountains (though am afraid of heights... but they're so pretty). I love travelling. Finding myself in a new space and becoming acquainted with the pulse of it; the people and their movements. 

I spent two weeks in Florida with the cute guy. It was a bit of an adventure. I'd never travelled with anyone other than family before and am really happy that we got along so well. I guess it helps that we like each other? Mark Twain once said, 'I have found out that there ain't no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them'. Perhaps the stress of travelling brings out stuff in people? We had fun. He's been to Florida before and so was showing me around. For me it was a  complete tourist experience because... I like being a tourist. Went to Epcot for their Food and Wine Festival - Epcot is amazing. Went to Magic Kingdom - we both love Disney. We stayed by some of his friends and went to Butterfly World and shopping malls. We had fun the entire time... right up until the end, the almost last day, when I got annoyed with him while shopping - but then, I don't think men and women are really made to shop together. 

After the two weeks in Florida he left to come home and I went on to Costa Rica for my Yoga Teacher Training at Nosara Yoga Institute. Have I mentioned that I love travelling? Costa Rica is beautiful. It felt very similar to home yet completely different. There was jungle and beaches and lots of biting insects. There was a lot of rain as it was almost-but-not-quite the end of the rainy season. I didn't do that much adventuring... mostly stayed in the area as I wanted to focus on the YTT and my reasons for being there. Perhaps I will go back sometime to explore the different areas. Perhaps I shall take the cute guy with me. Perhaps I will never go back but will always carry with me memories of rain in the jungle, sunsets on the beach, the sound of howler monkeys and the feel of dusty roadways. Perhaps I will just have a sense of community - one cannot share a space with a group of people for a month without having some shared sense of belonging. 

I have many memories to treasure. I have many photos to sort through.This is what I gather when travelling. What do you gather? Where do you want to go? Travelling need not be very far but can be as close as adventuring in your own neighbourhood or as far as the other side of... the world.

Go places. Adventure!

Playa Guiones, Nosara, Costa Rica - Photo taken almost at sunset...

peace,

Ren

Witnessing and being easy with self

"The moment you start watching the thinker, a higher level of consciousness becomes activated. You then begin to realize that there is a vast realm of intelligence beyond thought, that thought is only a tiny aspect of that intelligence. You also realise that all the things that truly matter - beauty, love, creativity, joy, inner peace - arise from beyond the mind. You begin to awaken." ~Eckhart Tolle 

Today is the last day of the second week of yoga teacher training. We've been talking and learning about focusing, witness consciousness, meditation and the various asanas - physical poses and how we can assist with them. Apart from the actual physical practice it is all stuff that I have heard before. I have been introduced to these ideas and thoughts from an early age and as long as I've been involved with the Blue Star, awareness of such has been a part of me.  

This week I have been sad and gloomy, thinking about my mom and just overall missing her... Then we had a conscious listening class in which I said what I was feeling and cried and then later I talked about it with the roommates and cried some more. I think sometimes for us to acknowledge stuff we need to speak it... let the words come into form and be released into the world for us to hear what's going on in our own heads.

I was sick the next day... flu-like symptoms. Perhaps it was a release of sorts because after that I felt so much better. I am missing my mom and that's ok. Her spirit is forever with me and instead of thinking of her absence, I  shall think of her presence and share with her as I have always done. 

The participants of the teacher training programme are amazing. We each come to this space with our own stories and ideas and learn from each other. As is normal with me it has taken some time for me to warm up to people... or open up... loosen up? I have three roommates who are wonderful and a few others who I feel a true connection with. Perhaps it is to be expected that for something like this there will be people who are searching in their own deeper way?

I've always thought that there's a reason we find ourselves in certain times and spaces with certain people. I have wanted to come to Costa Rica for this programme since 2010... I am now here. It is the perfect moment for whatever I need right now.

I was frustrated with myself last night... there was a group sharing session and although I strongly feel that there is much I could share in terms of thoughts and experiences I have not yet been able to bring myself to speak in front of such a large group. Am sitting with that feeling. When the time is right I shall say what I feel like saying and if the time does not come then that's alright. 

I'm being easy with myself. It is very freeing. 

Sending love to you all, and the wish that you go easy with your self as well. We all need care and the best person to provide that care is ourself. 

peace,

Ren

Contemplations and list-making.

"Goals help focus you on areas in both your personal and professional life that are important and meaningful, rather than being guided by what other people want you to be, do, or accomplish." ~Catherine Pulsifer

I freely admit to watching Friends reruns often. That is/was a fabulous show and is, I believe, the basis for a lot of other shows, which have  their own storylines and quirks but are essentially about friends coming together, such as my other faves: The Big Bang Theory and How I Met Your Mother... Yesterday's rerun was the episode 'The One Where They All Turn Thirty' in which Rachel celebrates her 30th birthday and there are flashbacks to the other Friends' birthdays... both Phoebe and Rachel have lists/plans to which they refer in this episode.. of things they'd like to achieve by a certain birthday. It reminded me that I'm supposed to be list-making - I have been - just in my head... thought I'd write it out here so you all could support me, in some way or the other, in getting through it.

In no particular order (though at some point I'd like to have an order).. things I'd like to do in my life:

• Get certified... I've got the MBA - I confess that I still don't quite know what to do with it and that the only reason I did it was because of parental pressure (in fact my dad is now claiming it as his MBA because of all the "WHY am I doing this?! I don't need this stress! I'm only doing it cuz YOU wanted me to do it" drama)... the certifications I really want?
• YTT  - yes, I'd like to do Yoga Teacher Training.. and I know where I want to do it... I'd like to do this 200-hour YTT and follow it with training on teaching yoga to children and seniors... then I'd like to come back home and teach.
• Certified Integral Qigong and Tai Chi™ Teacher - Way back when I was 16/17 I started doing Tai Chi and Qigong... it's amazing. I'm out of practice now but .. in 2009 I had a weekend workshop with Dr. Roger Jahnke and was re-inspired... I've wanted to do this training since then... then I'd like to come back home and teach the elderly.   
• Become a spy - not a killing-people-spy.. but a sexy-badass-spy - through the Stiletto Spy School - one of my best girl people had her birthday yesterday - we were trying to find something fun/exciting/daring to do as a girl group (epic fail that was..) ... If we were all in either NYC or Las Vegas... I'd have suggested that we become spies... because it is something that I want to do and it looks like so much fun! .. In fact maybe that should be the 30th b'day event. I've already got a spy-name and everything - courtesy of a fellow Kripalu volunteer... though I'm not about to divulge it yet :)
• Visit Findhorn... and maybe England and Ireland while I'm in that area... yes, there will be photo-taking. Actually... I'd like to travel here, there and everywhere.
• Learn to properly/fluently speak a foreign language. I've done Spanish at CXC... I've done Spanish for business courses... I can't remember much of it. Immersion may be necessary... so... live in a place where a foreign language is spoken (it doesn't have to be Spanish).
• Learn to sew... I can do embroidery... I can do chain-stitch and cross-stitch and various other pretty stitches... I have a fond memory of my (maternal)  grandma and I sewing together. I'd like to actually be able to make a garment though.. am somewhat inspired by our own Anya Ayoung-Chee and the fact that my (paternal) grandma was a bit of a seamstress... I should be able to sew.
• Clean my room... aka de-clutter... I'm sure my family would be happy to read this... and happier when it actually happens.. this should probably be at the top of my list.. meh.   
• Go on a cruise. I don't care where... wait - I do care. Go on a cruise somewhere warm. Alaska you are out.
• Change the world.. for the better.. I'm not sure how yet though I'm sure whatever I'm doing now is also helping.

That's all I can think of at the moment. Gonna work my way through this and think of other things along the way...  

peace,

Ren